It’s inevitable. When our behaviors change, the ones we love most will take notice, eventually.
I’m making personal changes, and during this time have decided to not make a huge announcement to loved ones. That is just the approach I have felt best for this. Although I knew that they would eventually notice, I wasn’t really prepared for their feedback.
The two statements from other’s that stand out most in my minimalist journey are:
You’re too risky.
It’s not really a huge deal, and those two statements were not intended to hurt me, it just really stood out.
My grandmother just passed away and has some items that she wanted passed down to me. My mom is in charge of her belongings now and told me that I was “too risky” to be given her stuff.
While that is amazingly true, it’s still a protective approach I feel coming from my mother and it’s totally cool. I do get it. I am ridding things out of my life and it’s hard to hide my many, many trips to the donation center as of late. And truly, while I love my grandmother from the bottom of my soul: I’m not into china plates. I know that when the timing is right, I will know what would truly mean something to me as far as items go. Right now, I am clinging to her memory in her passing and that is enough for me.
The other statement came from my husband when I told him “I just want us to be normal.” Now, this came from a point of weakness, because I am most certainly not ‘normal’ nor do I want to be. What I meant by that was: I want peace and harmony in my life. That’s better said than ‘normal.’
He lovingly told me that he doesn’t want me to change (aw!).
I asked why and his answer:
He loves me the way I am, but I’m just off-kilter.
(The word ‘but’ is amazing isn’t it?…..)
Maybe so, but this off-kilter is who I am. An unbalanced girl trying to find her thing, her heart, and her self again.
Although I don’t have the perfect answer on what to actually do when you change and how to deal with other’s who take notice, I can say this:
Continue following your heart. Your intuition is your guide and you really do know what’s best for you. Loved ones may comment, it may sting or throw you for a loop – but don’t let it stop you. If you are changing, it shakes things up in the relationship because you are different even if it’s for the best.
I don’t know about you, but I want to be different. So, that’s what I will continue to do.