Consent: Making my Personal Life Personal Again

Clarity, De-Cluttering, Free Spirit, Gentle Change, Hippie Life, Hippy Life, Letting Go, Minimalism

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Social Media has really taken over, hasn’t it? I remember when Facebook was just for college students, it was a whole lot more private, and didn’t take up so much emotional, mental and social energy. Well, I opened my account in 2004 when I was in college. I’ve been through all the waves and curve balls and here recently, I have just had enough.

I have had enough ‘social posting responsibility’ and people micro managing what I post, who and what I respond to, and the like. Not only that, I notice that the more time I was spending on Facebook the worse I felt. It’s like I was watching a train wreck, but couldn’t quit looking.

I’m not against people who want to use Facebook by any means. But, by hearing my close family and friends chatter about it – it seems they are getting a good fill of it too. Jealousy, frustration, feeling less-than, and constantly comparing their lives with someone else. I mean, we all know deep down that people only post their highlights mostly, but it still can be a real drainer of energy if we don’t control it.

I took it upon myself to go on a Facebook hiatus the last few months and it has been lovely. Yes, I have missed out on a few social updates; like someone had a baby or got married. That’s awesome and all, but I don’t need to continually ‘stalk’ other’s daily lives anymore. I have a lot on my plate and I am changing and rearranging my life – and really don’t have time for that.

So, I deactivated my account today. Although I wasn’t logging on, I feel better knowing that I am unsearchable. I know people are going to notice, and when they do, I will just inform them to text or call me if they need something, no biggie.

I remember the days before social media. It seems like I knew a lot about what was going on around town anyway without logging on to read other people’s business. And also, obsessing over posting MY OWN business. Do I really want everyone to know what I’m doing? No, I don’t.

My personal life is now that. Personal. And I’m already liking it better that way.

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8 thoughts on “Consent: Making my Personal Life Personal Again

  1. Love this. I just deleted the app off my phone, and I hardly ever go on Facebook anymore. It makes it more inconvenient to upload pictures or scroll mindlessly… so I just… don’t! I kept the messenger app because I use it just as often as I text. And it’s actually really, really nice to not get push notifications all day and night about things I’m only remotely interested in!

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    1. That’s awesome! It’s amazing how after a few days of not having it at our fingertips how much EXTRA time there is during the day. I just fill the gap now with other things that need to be done. I hope to continue untethered here on out!

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  2. Good thoughts here. Like many, I have a love/hate relationship wih Facebook. I’ve deleted then started over. I may try deactivating as a fast. I once or twice deleted it from my phone for a while.

    So I guess you feel the same about Twitter and Google+, right? Or Pinterest? As a fellow blogger, have you had any reservations about not sharing your blog posts to social media? Do you see sharing publically on a blog with followers different from Facebook sharing? I’m not trying to persuade you in any way. I’m wondering for myself. Would I be much better off without Facebook? Thing is, I used to blog family stuff only. But then Facebook came out and became the place to keep family updated.

    Thanks for your thoughts. 🙂

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    1. Yep – Jason, that’s kind of my struggle as I kind of ‘pick & choose’ my avenue for thoughts and life. I have a love/hate with Facebook for sure. Although, I’ve never gotten into Twitter and Google+ but I would imagine them kind of similar. I still do Pinterest, although I recently ‘started over’ but it really is just the same thing once over. I feel like when the negative feelings I have from social media intrude on the feelings about my life and my self is when I have to unplug. You know, like jealousy or feeling like ‘my life isn’t measuring up’ or like, ‘my marriage isn’t as loving as xyz’s’ I mean, we all know that FB is a highlight sight, but if those internal feelings arise – that’s when I say unplug because it can get unhealthy. I don’t hate it and certainly think it has a lot of pros but I hear SO MUCH negativity from myself and everyone else in my life about FB. Since I’ve deactivated it, I just overall feel much better because I have nothing or no one to compare to except MYSELF! ha!

      I don’t share my blog posts on social media – just here on wordpress. I try to surround myself with inspiration here and enjoy reading about other’s heartfelt feelings, journey’s and lives. Seems like it’s a lot more ‘real’ and ‘raw’ and that’s what I’m after here.

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  3. I am revisiting this topic. I came across fresh articles about this, ya know, ‘you’re better off without Facebook.’ After reevaluating how I’ve come to use Facebook, I did a purge. I went from hundreds to just a handful of real friends and family. We’ll see how it goes. I still may dactivate or delete altogether. I’m still mulling it over, pros/cons. The fundamental or underlying thing is a sort of nagging question like, “Why do I often feel Facebook is something I need to be freed from?” Or, why do I feel reservation against the dominance of Facebook? I think it’s because it is so dominant, you feel like you must be on it.

    Anyways, thanks again for sharing. I, too, like the more ‘real’ stuff on blogs, plus the greater control.

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    1. Those are the questions I began asking myself, too. There are def pros and cons and like anything else, we have to decide what to keep in our lives, discard, or moderate. My FB is still deactivated. I’m surprised I’ve lasted this long to tell you the truth lol!

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  4. Well, I did it. I didn’t just deactivate; I deleted my Facebook account. Nuked from orbit. It’s been 9 days since I did it. I had FOMO the first 2 or 3 days, then it went away. It was already not a big part of my life anyways. I kind of wound down from using it. There were a few small factors that kept irking me about it. As I’ve said, a big factor was me not liking the feeling that I had to be on Facebook just because “everyone” is on Facebook. I didn’t like feeling obligated to have it, driven by FOMO. There’s nothing to actually miss out from Facebook, it only feels that way because so many folks are on it. It makes you think that since “everyone” is on it, you gotta be there too because there must be something there worth looking into, otherwise “everyone” wouldn’t be on it. But then you go there and find nothing really there. It’s an illusion of friendship or connection. It has some utility for communication, but there’s plenty of other good ways to communicate with real life friends and family. I think being off Facebook will help me avoid the not-so-good parts about it. Anyways, there it is.

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    1. Ah! I am so excited you took the BIG plunge! I am seriously thinking about completely deleting mine too. I’m not sure what’s stopping me from just doing it. Since my deactivation and getting over the FOMO, I have zero desire to be on it anymore. That is a major thing that’s bugging me too – the ‘everyone is on it’ so I just gotta have one and be involved too. It’s odd that when I tell people I’m not active on FB you would think I told them that I’m an alien from outer space. I am feeling inspired though. I truly think we all could benefit from less social media and more living. I’m gonna research a good way to preserve all my FB photos and then try to take the plunge too 🙂 Keep us posted on what beautiful things happen in your life without the fake social crutch 🙂

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