6/16/16

Clarity

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I have gut-fear today. The reason being is that I have set a quit date.

June 16, 2016.

This date literally popped in my mind as I was meditating on passion. With my quiet mind and Sacred Spirit activated, it showed as clear as crystal.

And, after I saw that date it said: Q  U  I  T

Quit struggling

Quit frustration

Quit doing what doesn’t light you up inside-out

Just quit.

Besides being my birthday, I’m not sure why this is the date nor, do I have to understand why because it just is what it is.

Previously, I would have ignored this random revelation. Since I slowly shifting to instinctual decision-making, I simply can not ignore this nugget.

So, I am writing it down here.

My gut-fear is fiery and I am pretty excited. This time, I will not be making a gameplan, but I will just be. I will let it happen and unfold and trust that my answers will come in time.

Gut-Fear

Gentle Change, Gut-Fear, Meditation

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That little gut-burn of fear we all know so well, can be fuel. It can also paralyze us into a rut that seems insurmountable. I’ve worked on both sides of fear for many years and have learned some things to be true:

  1. Harnessing that gut-fear takes courage
  2. When used as fuel, gut-fear makes opportunities seem endless
  3. Power can be scary, but that’s the best place to live and make decisions from
  4. Failure is possible, but not taking risk is even worse than failing
  5. Little gut-fear triumphs add up to some serious, miraculous change for the better

I work from places of complacency and fear, both. Sometimes I don’t feel like going with my gut for whatever reason. If I rock along in this state for too long, I paralyze and get stuck. Life feels ‘off.’ Negative energy attracts to me. My mind will tell me that going with my gut will be too much effort and it’s just not worth it. After a while, this causes me burnout and frustration.

When I take the time to notice that gut-fear for what it is, and use it for the positive, I feel powerful. I make clear, conscious choices. I take risks. I have that hard conversation: I stop behaviors that bother me: I don’t take any shit: I do new things: I create: I sleep better: I have more energy.

I am vowing to make more choices from the positive gut-fear. I will sit with it, listen to it, and let my intuition guide me. There is no need to fight the fear. It’s part of life and it will always be there, for all of us. It’s primal. It’s part of living. Why should it be the enemy?

I have been meditating on my fears for a while now and looked them all directly in the face. One by one, I realize that it is my internal energy, my heart, my soul speaking to me. If it is a fear that repeats and continues, I know that my intuition is speaking and I must listen.

We all have intuition for a reason, no matter how big or small.

I want to move forward listening to my center. I need that connection to myself. That’s where we should live from.

We are enough just as we are today. We are bigger than our negative thoughts or fears. Let’s harness them, listen to what it’s really telling us, and act.

You Have Permission

Clarity, Free Spirit, Hippy Life, Letting Go, Minimalism, Simple Life, Simplicity

metanoia

As human beings we want to connect to others and use words to describe how we feel.

This is hard for me sometimes, because some things that I feel inside my heart are so profound that I can’t find the right words to bring it to life.

It doesn’t seem right to say that I’m just:

  • De-cluttering
  • Simplifying
  • Becoming minimalist
  • Going natural
  • Making room for priorities
  • Spending less
  • Saving more
  • Getting out of debt

and most of all

Living daily for who and what is most important in my life.

I found the word that describes my journey and I want to share because perhaps you feel it gyrating deep in your bones too.

METANOIA

We don’t have to be who we were yesterday. We don’t have to live on auto-pilot anymore. You have permission to let go, spread your wings, and be who your heart is telling you to be.

Manipulating Circumstances

Clarity, De-Cluttering, Free Spirit, Minimalism, Minimalist

Gaining clarity during simplifying is one of the biggest benefits to a minimalistic lifestyle. There comes a time in the process of de-cluttering and re-arranging priorities that a lightbulb goes off.

It’s that little voice that tells you:

Stop manipulating your circumstances.

Little did I know, I was a manipulator and a controller. I felt like my life was under my control every step of the way. I thought that I could go with the flow, but in reality, it was just a cover-up. One slip up or one little blip could derail me at any moment and I knew it.

That thought alone scared me half to death, not to mention gave me daily anxiety trying to keep it all together.

Thankfully, I have learned from my experiences. A job layoff got this ball rolling, it was as simple as that.

One day, my finances worked. I had a job. I could plan on things. I knew what income I had and I based my life on that. Everything that I controlled fit in this little bubble of mine.

That is, until it didn’t.

I learned so much more from losing my job besides ‘oh, shit’ I don’t have any way to pay bills or continue my lifestyle this way.

I adapted and realized that I have so much without that type of stability. My priorities and security was in my job, itself. There is more to me than that.

Letting go and simplifying creates a unique perspective. You soon realize that the clothes, makeup, fancy cars, expensive food, and junk cluttering up your house is just a cover-up. Those things are not who you are. Not even close.

When the dust fades and income is removed, or when you donate excess clutter from your life, it shows just how meaningless some of the things you put as a priority truly are.

The most empowering thing of all is figuring out what to do with less. It’s exhilarating to let go and realize that you can, in fact, survive without it.

Take a Chance, Make a Change

Capsule Wardrobes, Clarity, De-Cluttering, Debt, Free Spirit, Gentle Change, Hippie Life, Hippy Life, Letting Go, Meditation, Minimalism, Minimalist, Money, Simple Life, Simplicity, Yoga

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We have a chance to make numerous choices every, single day. There comes a point though, when maybe our auto-pilot life becomes comfortable. Boring, stagnant, and comfortable. We realize beneath it all something is lacking. Our joy has been squelched due to the day-to-day demands that we dictate to ourselves. We measure our worth based on checking off the to-do-list and then beating ourselves up when we simply can’t accomplish it all.

That’s a rut. It’s a tough one to admit to, and a stickler to dig out of.

That’s where I was just a few short months ago. I started running – not walking – in the opposite direction.

It was time to take a risk: I have to change and take some risks, here. 

This realization and admittance that I am in fact, not Super Woman was a little hard to come to grips with, but there was truth beneath the surface.

I don’t want to be Super Woman.

I don’t want to be living in chaos. I don’t want to feel overwhelmed and full of anxiety. I want peace and joy.

The contrast between the two are pretty drastic.

That means I have to open my mind and try different solutions to my struggle.

Day by day, my slow changes are really easing my anxiety and happiness is finally creeping in. I do things a little differently now by:

  1. Getting rid of excess and clutter for clarity and less wasted time on organizing and picking up.
  2. Removing social media from my life so I can focus on myself and what’s important.
  3. Thinking positively by meditating and appreciating what I have and where I’m going.
  4. Letting go of other people’s behavior and my past.
  5. Changing daily chores: I hang clothes to dry, use less dishes and hand-wash when done, put things back where they belong, and let it go when I want to do something else.
  6. Eating well helps me feel energized and lose excess pounds.
  7. Paying off debt by getting my finances in order and stop useless spending.
  8. Daily Yoga helps my body stretch and tone as well as a great way to integrate balance in my life.
  9. Being conscious of my beauty routine where less is definitely more.
  10. Creating a capsule wardrobe so my style is consistent and less stressful when getting ready and wasting money filling the gaps for sake of fashion.

These 10 changes have taken time. I began slowly and deliberately and have really tried to understand myself and my past along the way. It’s been my saving grace in the stickabilty to a major life change like this one.

Knowing you need to make a change and then taking the plunge can be scary. But there is nothing to fear. You can always go back to the way things were before. I mean, what’s there to lose?

Enjoy the Journey Up

Free Spirit, Gentle Change, Hippie Life, Hippy Life, Letting Go, Minimalism, Simplicity

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When I was telling my best friend about the biggest, hardest, tragic, most emotional event in my life she said the comforting, lovely words to me: “Shit happens.”

Well, that was pretty blunt and why I love her so much.

Not what I wanted to hear necessarily, but it was definitely a shot of truth. Over the last few years I have tried hard to accept some truths about my situation and life as hard as it is. And then, last night I finally had a revelation. I mean, I’ve know this revelation, but somehow it just sunk in and gave me peace.

See, here in Alabama we are hardcore college football fanatics. It is serious business. And, being a University of Alabama football fan – we hear it all the time:

When you are at the top, there’s only one way to go. Down.

This is our justification for winning so many championships and taking it to heart and being spoiled so when we lose it is pretty much the end of the world. Panic strikes and there are tears and toddler tantrums from adults.

Could it be that I am tired of the swampy heat and craving some rotel dip? Probably. Or could it be that it makes sense and that my life circumstance could also apply the same concept?

I’ve been on top of the world. I busted my tail to get where I was. As far as I was concerned I had ‘made it’ and my life was about to be gravy. My hard work and conscious decisions lead me to where I wanted to go: great credit, awesome SUV, husband, cute house, baby, and a stellar job.

I mean, what else really is there?

The ‘what else is there?’ is that you can fall to the bottom quick. Should the stars not align perfectly one day, you can be knocked off the high horse. Deep down we know that can happen – I mean…who’s gonna stop that tornado from demolishing your home, or a sickness, or wreck, or any other crisis? Not me, and not you.

The problem was that I clung so hard to my life that I created. I did it. It worked out. But it was A LOT of pressure to keep it there. Constantly on the defense. Always stressing and worrying about getting knocked off.

And then it happened.

I was knocked to the bottom and nearly lost everything.

Not of any fault of my own – it just happened and there was nothing I could do to stop it.

So here I am with a mess.

But secretly (and here was my acceptance and revelation)… I am thankful.

What? How in tha? How did I do that?

Well, if you are at the top there’s only one way to go…down.

But, if you are at the bottom there is only one way to go…UP!

Yay!

I can let go of the control and pressure from the top. The top is where I was using all my energy for worry and defense and stress to stay there.

I am at the bottom and it’s an excellent way to do things differently. I can now do things the way I want and not the way society tells me I have to.

I can let go and enjoy the journey.

Because truth is, I feel the same as I did at the top except I don’t have the pressure to stay there. I can ride back up with a different set of eyes. I can create something new and beautiful. I can learn from the fall. I can learn to trust intuition and destiny.

When you have nothing to lose, you lose nothing. 

Dreamer

De-Cluttering, Free Spirit, Gentle Change, Hippie Life, Hippy Life, Minimalism, Simplicity

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It’s all too common to fall asleep thinking of the never ending to-do list. You run over in your mind what all you still had to accomplish that day, but didn’t. Defeat takes over. Regret. Anxiety. Not to mention you have to get up in several hours to go to work – to a job that you aren’t all too happy in because you are a slave to debt.

Now you can’t sleep.

Grr.

Maybe in your past you made mistakes. Perhaps you are a slave to consumerism: constantly buying stuff to fill the void. Perhaps your schedule is so busy that there isn’t room to take care of what matters most to you.

I feel like this a whole lot.

That’s my motivation for simplifying my life. I am actively trying to remove those things that weigh me down and take my attention off my dreams.

I’m slowly giving up the soul sucking energy and behaviors. 

1. De-Cluttering my Home: I am getting rid of the things that don’t matter, that I don’t love. Those possessions that are attached to negative energy and memories. They must go.

2. No to Consumerism: I am no longer shopping for fun, instead, I only buy what is vital so I can pay of my credit card debt.

3. Dreamer: Somewhere along the way in busyness and being a ‘grown-up,’ I forgot what it’s like to dream. With debt, a home, family, and kids, my dreams went by the wayside. I still have hopes and dreams deep down. I am slowly allowing those dreams to surface so I may soon take action.

4. Social Media: Facebook had become a negative in my life. I couldn’t help but to look and scroll the newsfeed, but it always left me feeling a little depressed: people on my nerves, feeling like my life wasn’t as happy as someone elses, other people commenting on my activity. I’m on hiatus. I may not ever go back.

5. Diet: I am using food as my energy source instead of entertainment. I eat when I am hungry. When I do eat, it’s minimal sugar and lots of veggies.

6. Yoga: This is a new passion. It helps relieve anxiety and also gets me in shape and tones muscles.

By getting rid of a lot of negatives and adding more positives, I feel more clear. I feel like I can make better decisions.

So, by the end of the day when I am snuggled up in my bed, I will allow my hopes and dreams to come forward. I will rest in peace knowing that my choices today affect tomorrow. I am getting control of my life back and it feels so nice.

What Consumes the Mind, Controls Our Life

Clarity, De-Cluttering, Free Spirit, Gentle Change, Hippie Life, Hippy Life, Letting Go, Meditation, Minimalism, Simplicity

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Simplifying our lives has many aspects to it; and it varies from each person to person. For me, I am not an extremist by any stretch, but I want to remove the excess that is weighing me down so I can be energized and focus on what truly matters to me.

As I am constantly de-cluttering my possessions and spending less on consumerist spending, I am also de-cluttering my mind. When I first began simplifying my life, I knew I needed to get rid of physical clutter to have more brain space and clarity to get down to business on my insides. It was only natural that at some point, a lot of my mental clutter began surfacing as I was decreasing the amount of possessions I owned.

This is my favorite part of a minimalist lifestyle!

For me, “you are what you eat” translates not only to actual food consumption, but also to what I take in to my mind and thoughts. My focus is to remove the negativity that keeps clouding my thoughts and turn it in to positive affirmations.

I took a few weeks to really listen to my thoughts that rattle within. My inner voice was speaking; and it wasn’t pretty. Self doubt, worry, frustration, anger, and incessant chatter seemed to never end. After meditation and letting go of this mindset, I knew there were some changes that I would have to make to clear the mental clutter.

This became a priority and still is.

1. Social Media: I am off of Facebook. Period. I was comparing myself to others, and then other people’s constant questioning about my personal Facebook activity was a major trigger in anxiety. Now, all of my closest family and friends know to contact me directly via telephone or person if they have something to communicate as I am not on Facebook for the drama anymore. It was weird for a few days because I would unknowingly pick up my phone to check Facebook as a terrible habit. But, I had deleted the icon app as a reminder not to log on. I don’t miss it at all.

2. News: I love the news and shows like Nancy Grace (my hero!). However, I feel very agitated, angry, and defensive after soaking in updates from around home and the globe. Truly, I was getting to where I felt hopeless and sad. So, I simply just don’t watch it any longer. Now, I know they say to keep up with cultural events and such; and I do get info from my Husband on events that I am interested in so I can stay in the loop on what matters to me. But guess what? The world hasn’t crashed and I haven’t become an obsolete being just because I am not ranting over politics and the like.

3. Diet: I can’t think well if I don’t feel well. My eating habits have changed and I no longer include sugar in my diet. I feel more energized and can focus on what matters – like having fun – instead of feeling guilty because of what I have eaten during the day.

4. Drama: Other people have a way of sucking me into their drama. I am by nature a very empathetic and compassionate person, so I take on other people’s burdens as my own. This drags me so far down and makes me collapse with exhaustion. This is probably one of my #1 soul suckers. I have to consciously choose not to be involved in drama anymore and it’s making a huge difference in my positivity.

I want positive, hopeful, happy thoughts. Along with my possessions, I am de-cluttering the gunk as well. We think what we take in. We speak what we take in. We feel what we take in.

Isn’t it time we put a barrier to the negativity so we can embrace our true selves? If you want to feel energetic, you must take in energy. If you want to think positively, you must consume positivity. Let’s use our energy for positive vibes instead of the negative, shall we?

What gunk to you need to get rid of to add some light into your days?

Other People and Our Inner Peace

Clarity, Free Spirit, Gentle Change, Hippie Life, Hippy Life, Minimalism, Simplicity

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How many times has someone else ruined your day? They didn’t do what you thought they should do. They didn’t compliment you when you thought you deserved it. They looked at you the wrong way. They didn’t pick up after themselves. Basically every one else is ruining your life!

I keep using the word ‘your’ but I am actually talking about myself.

It’s amazing how easy it is for someone else to impact my life. I don’t know where along the line this because such a huge problem for me, but it has.

Basically, I just think other people should know how to act. Simple.

Well, it’s not so simple in reality, now is it?

When I change the way I view others and take back the power they have over my life, I am happier. I am in control of myself and my reactions.

  • Should I choose to not let someone else bother me, that’s just that: they don’t bother me.
  • Should I choose not to be emotionally invested in someone else’s drama: I’m not in the drama.
  • Should I take responsibility for what I want done: it gets done.
  • Should I not let someone else’s bad mood be my mood: I’m in control of my own mood.
  • Should I not wait on someone else to make me happy: I make myself happy.
  • Should I not blame other’s on where I am in my life: I realize I am responsible for my own life.

This is important because when we take responsibility for our actions, we can align better with who we are supposed to be. There’s no more waiting on someone else, or some miracle to be happy. We choose to be happy. We choose how to live out our days. Do we have to stay stuck where we are today? No, we don’t. We can change our circumstance with simple, deliberate choices fueled with positivity.

How can we do that?

To simply start.

Make the conscious effort to change, and start taking responsibility for where you are now and where you want to be.  Be realistic, but be deliberate. Pick one thing today that you are unhappy about and do something about it. It doesn’t have to be monumental, major, or life changing. Start small. Is your car messy? Clean it out. Did you eat too much over the weekend? Eat light today. Are you in debt? Don’t spend any money today, and make do with with you have. Little choices add up to the big things in the end. Take back control. That’s what I’m going to do.

Tending to Your Soul

Clarity, Free Spirit, Gentle Change, Hippie Life, Hippy Life, Letting Go, Meditation, Minimalism, Simplicity

Yoga isn’t about executing the poses perfectly or having the best balance. Yoga is connecting with yourself. Yoga is like learning to breathe again, or that moment when you jump out of bed in the morning, rush outside to do the sun salutation, and you’re utterly blinded by how brilliant the world can be. Yoga is taking a moment from your stressful, up-beat life and remembering you have a soul that needs tending to. ~ Unknown

The world truly can be beautiful and brilliant when we take the time to slow down and enjoy it. This has always been so hard for me: just as it is for so many people.

I feel that it is selfish and un-productive if I stop to breathe and do a few stretches.

Since I have began my yoga journey, I see how important it is to take the time to look within yourself. Yoga is not about being a pretzel, it’s about being deliberate. Being deliberate in loving on yourself every day. It’s about letting go of house chores realizing that it’s OK to take a break, get healthy, and press on within. When sticking through yoga, the to-do list shows up in the mind, but you learn to see it, and let it go. You begin to understand that the dishes will still be in the sink when you get done. They will. And it is perfectly fine.

It’s a daily practice of peace.

Whether you do yoga or not, it’s important you find something that allows you to be still, get healthy, and focus on yourself. It could be a walk, a bubble bath, a jog down a trail, gardening, drawing, watching the sunset. If it means you check in with yourself for at least 20 minutes or so to allow your self-worth to come forward: then you have found it! When you find it, do that and do it every day.